The Brickulator is a machine that does exactly what its name suggests: it turns anything you put into it – from clothing to food – into a perfectly shaped brick.
The device was commissioned by Montgomery Tissue, Geraldine’s extremely rich dad, who has a severe allergy to two things: mess and folding laundry. With a mansion full of servants, the Tissues simply threw their clothes on the floor, leaving their mess for others to clean. But when the servants were away, their home became a horrifyingly chaotic disaster.
So, Montgomery hired an inventor to build the world’s most perfect clothes-folding machine.
The inventor, however, found the task too difficult. Instead of a neatly folded shirt, his machine compressed it into a perfectly solid, brick-shaped block. Montgomery found this “satisfactory.”
The machine’s true purpose was only
discovered when Geraldine, in a fit of rage, threw a whole pot of spaghetti into its chute.
Out popped a single, immaculately clean spaghetti brick.
Since the Tissues detest messy food even more than messy clothes, they now eat all their meals in brick form.
It may not be pleasant, but it’s certainly tidy.